This is a little late but I wanted to update everyone on the September referrals. In early September the CCAA (China Center for Adoption Affairs) referred children to those waiting parents logged in through November 25, 2005. That is only 4 days worth of referrals, in one months time. At this rate we will be in our 40's before we would receive a referral. I have mentioned before that the wait is growing, and there seems to be no end in sight. Because of this, as well as many other reasons, we have decided to also be on our agencies "Waiting Child" List.
I have discussed the process for the Waiting Child Program in previous blog entries, but will revisit the process, for those that are interested. We notified our agency at the beginning of this year that we would be interested in adopting a child on the Waiting Child List. This program works as follows: an agency is sent a list of children with special needs. Typically the special needs are minor and/or correctable. The children range in age from 6 months to 12 years. After the age of 6 a child is considered "special needs" because of their age. Each agency receives a different list and is responsible for "matching" these children with interested adoptive parents. Each agency handles this "matching" process in their own way. Our agency handles it in what we feel is a very fair manner (unlike many other agencies). When we notified our agency that we were interested in this program they had us tell them what age and gender we were comfortable with, as well as what special needs we would consider. We told them that we would like a girl under the age of 3, and that we would consider any special need. When we made them aware of our desire they put us on a list with all the other prospective adoptive parents who were signed with them. When each new waiting child list comes in (every 3 months or so) they go in order and match the children with the parents they have on their list according to the parents list of acceptable special needs and the childs special need. If no match can be made they then allow those who are not signed with them already to request information on the child. Our agency received their last list in mid-August. After matching all the children on that list we are now around 9th on the list of waiting adoptive parents. The agency recieves a list of about 10 children, so we could be next! However, because most of the people in front of us are also requesting a girl around the same age as us, it is more likely that we will be matched in the list after the next one. We are very excited that we could see our baby girl's face sometime in the next 6 months are so. After we recieve a referral, and accept it, it will then be approxiamtely 3-4 months to complete all the necessary paperwork and head to China. We are really hoping we will be able to get to China before the Olympics begin in Beijing next August. Traveling during the Olympics (although we do not have to travel to Beijing) would be very expensive and much more difficult. Personally, I would really like to see China in the Spring. I may be too optimistic, and it may be more likely that we will see China in the fall. Whenever we go I know it will be a wonderful journey, and I can't wait to meet our baby girl.
As for now, I can't help but think that my Dad is in Heaven and he is looking down on China, and watching our baby girl! He was a big supporter of our adoption, and it makes me very sad that he will not get to meet his granddaughter, and she will never know the most influential man in my life. I will be sure and show her lots of pictures, and tell her lots of wonderful stories about her PawPaw!
Monday, September 24, 2007
Friday, September 14, 2007
My Dad
If this is rambling, please excuse, but my Dad passed away yesterday, September 13th. I cannot sleep and there is no planning left to do and no cleaning that can be done right now, so I am going to try and get my thoughts out.
For those of you who don't know me and/or my Dad, he was the most wonderful, caring man around. We had a relationship that many Daddies and daughters dream about. I was Daddy's Little Girl. I could call him anytime of day or night and he would be there. He loved his family tremendously, and we loved him more then words can say. I can't help but think about all the things that I am going to miss about him. Of course, his hug, and simply him being there. He was always there. He has been retired for the past 4 1/2 years, and he worked fulltime for his kids and grandkids!!! So, he was always there! He was always the one I called if I something had happened that I wanted to tell someone. There were times when the kids would do something and I just needed to tell someone and I would call him. If I needed ANYTHING, he was there. I remember I had been sick one day, shortly after Steve and I got married. I was laying on the couch in our home, and My Dad came to the door with a HUGE package of Snickers, my favorite candy bar. It was a simple gesture, but made me feel so much better. There are so many stories like that, and I just can't even remember them right now, which makes me sad, b/c I want to remember everything he ever did or said. We were talking about things I will miss. He made the BEST steaks in town. He wanted to make us steaks one night this week, we never set a night, and I will never have those steaks again. He and I made grilled cheese sandwiches as midnight snacks when I was a teenager, I will never eat another sandwich made by him; I will never eat another grilled cheese without thinking of him. When we were little he worked so hard, but he was always there for us. He made it a point to find an area that had good schools and a good community, and that is where they moved, to raise a family. He drove over an hour each way to work, just so we could stay in a good community. He sacrificed for his family, that is a true Daddy! He got up really early every morning so he could get to work early and be back home before we got home from school. Mom had to work evenings, so Dad was there. He wanted to give us everything. Mom and Dad didn't have the money to give us everyything, but they sure tried! They would do without so we could have what we needed, and for the most part what we wanted. I remember going to the fair every year, and having the best time. We took very few vacations, but we did alot together around here. We had Six Flags season passes every year, and Mom and Dad would take us when Dad got home from work, or on the weekends. Dad didn't particularly like the roller coasters, but he rode them with me, because I wanted to. We spent most of our summers at Sun Valley Beach, Mom would take us and we would spend much of the day, and Dad would drive straight there after work, and spend the afternoon and evening swimming and playing with us. If we weren't at Sun Valley, we were at home, swimming. I loved to jump off Daddy's shoulders into the water. We only had a small above ground pool, but we had the best time. Later, my parents put in a nice inground pool for the grandkids. He took immaculate care of that pool. He would complain that he had to do all the work, but he loved it, and loved it when we would all come over and swim or just hang out. We would often end up staying for dinner, and he always had plenty for everyone. Though he would never admit it, he loved having a house full of people. Growing up, our house was the house we all hung out at. Dad made everything fun. He also gave me so much good advice growing up. We would stay up late at night (waiting on my older sister to come home) and he would tell me all kinds of stories about him growning up, and give me lots of advice on life! I am so glad we shared those times.
He loved his grandkids! He loved my boys, and had a special relationship with them, since he was adopted himself. Paul spent many hours with PawPaw in the garage, "working on" something. Recently he gave Paul a can of spray paint, and let him paint the sea of a mini-bike he was rebuilding. Paul thought he was so big, and he was so proud of that seat! He was so looking forward to having another grandchild, his second granddaughter, Molly. My parents didn't have any money, but over the last couple of months anytime he sold somehting on Ebay he would take half of the money, and put it in our "Molly Fund." He wanted to help in anyway he could. He knew that I didn't really want to be asked question after question about the adoption, but he would check this blog daily, so he would know if there were any updates. He was a great man. I know my horrible grammar and rambled thoughts are not making much sense, but it has helped me tremendously. There are so many things I can say, and so many memories that I have, but I just can't write them all right now. I will probably be back with more ramblings about my Dad. Please pray for our family as we struggle through the next few days, and prepare to get on with our lives. Pray for my Mom, she is a very emotional person. She is going to have a very difficult time, and at this point doesn't want to go on. My brother is in town, and will probably stay for a good while, and that will help her tremendously. She also has a wonderful friend, who has not left her side. I don't know what we would have done without Wanda. Kelli and I had so much to do yesterday, to get ready for the viewing and funeral, without Wanda being there for Mom, we would not have been able to do it.
One more thing. It is so wonderful to have a brother and a sister to get throught this with. so many families have so much division in their family, and would not be able to work together to plan a funeral without considerable arguing. Dad and Mom raised us to love and care about each other, and everything that we had to plan and do went very smoothly.
Thanks for reading my ramblings.
For those of you who don't know me and/or my Dad, he was the most wonderful, caring man around. We had a relationship that many Daddies and daughters dream about. I was Daddy's Little Girl. I could call him anytime of day or night and he would be there. He loved his family tremendously, and we loved him more then words can say. I can't help but think about all the things that I am going to miss about him. Of course, his hug, and simply him being there. He was always there. He has been retired for the past 4 1/2 years, and he worked fulltime for his kids and grandkids!!! So, he was always there! He was always the one I called if I something had happened that I wanted to tell someone. There were times when the kids would do something and I just needed to tell someone and I would call him. If I needed ANYTHING, he was there. I remember I had been sick one day, shortly after Steve and I got married. I was laying on the couch in our home, and My Dad came to the door with a HUGE package of Snickers, my favorite candy bar. It was a simple gesture, but made me feel so much better. There are so many stories like that, and I just can't even remember them right now, which makes me sad, b/c I want to remember everything he ever did or said. We were talking about things I will miss. He made the BEST steaks in town. He wanted to make us steaks one night this week, we never set a night, and I will never have those steaks again. He and I made grilled cheese sandwiches as midnight snacks when I was a teenager, I will never eat another sandwich made by him; I will never eat another grilled cheese without thinking of him. When we were little he worked so hard, but he was always there for us. He made it a point to find an area that had good schools and a good community, and that is where they moved, to raise a family. He drove over an hour each way to work, just so we could stay in a good community. He sacrificed for his family, that is a true Daddy! He got up really early every morning so he could get to work early and be back home before we got home from school. Mom had to work evenings, so Dad was there. He wanted to give us everything. Mom and Dad didn't have the money to give us everyything, but they sure tried! They would do without so we could have what we needed, and for the most part what we wanted. I remember going to the fair every year, and having the best time. We took very few vacations, but we did alot together around here. We had Six Flags season passes every year, and Mom and Dad would take us when Dad got home from work, or on the weekends. Dad didn't particularly like the roller coasters, but he rode them with me, because I wanted to. We spent most of our summers at Sun Valley Beach, Mom would take us and we would spend much of the day, and Dad would drive straight there after work, and spend the afternoon and evening swimming and playing with us. If we weren't at Sun Valley, we were at home, swimming. I loved to jump off Daddy's shoulders into the water. We only had a small above ground pool, but we had the best time. Later, my parents put in a nice inground pool for the grandkids. He took immaculate care of that pool. He would complain that he had to do all the work, but he loved it, and loved it when we would all come over and swim or just hang out. We would often end up staying for dinner, and he always had plenty for everyone. Though he would never admit it, he loved having a house full of people. Growing up, our house was the house we all hung out at. Dad made everything fun. He also gave me so much good advice growing up. We would stay up late at night (waiting on my older sister to come home) and he would tell me all kinds of stories about him growning up, and give me lots of advice on life! I am so glad we shared those times.
He loved his grandkids! He loved my boys, and had a special relationship with them, since he was adopted himself. Paul spent many hours with PawPaw in the garage, "working on" something. Recently he gave Paul a can of spray paint, and let him paint the sea of a mini-bike he was rebuilding. Paul thought he was so big, and he was so proud of that seat! He was so looking forward to having another grandchild, his second granddaughter, Molly. My parents didn't have any money, but over the last couple of months anytime he sold somehting on Ebay he would take half of the money, and put it in our "Molly Fund." He wanted to help in anyway he could. He knew that I didn't really want to be asked question after question about the adoption, but he would check this blog daily, so he would know if there were any updates. He was a great man. I know my horrible grammar and rambled thoughts are not making much sense, but it has helped me tremendously. There are so many things I can say, and so many memories that I have, but I just can't write them all right now. I will probably be back with more ramblings about my Dad. Please pray for our family as we struggle through the next few days, and prepare to get on with our lives. Pray for my Mom, she is a very emotional person. She is going to have a very difficult time, and at this point doesn't want to go on. My brother is in town, and will probably stay for a good while, and that will help her tremendously. She also has a wonderful friend, who has not left her side. I don't know what we would have done without Wanda. Kelli and I had so much to do yesterday, to get ready for the viewing and funeral, without Wanda being there for Mom, we would not have been able to do it.
One more thing. It is so wonderful to have a brother and a sister to get throught this with. so many families have so much division in their family, and would not be able to work together to plan a funeral without considerable arguing. Dad and Mom raised us to love and care about each other, and everything that we had to plan and do went very smoothly.
Thanks for reading my ramblings.
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